Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Standard-Examiner: Boss Godfrey Seeks Two Brand Spankin' New Firetrucks

A renewed commitment to Emerald City public safety... or a very slight drop in a very empty bucket?

We're growing increasingly concerned that our beloved Mayor Boss Godfrey may have been been kidnapped by space aliens and replaced by a weird cyborg with programming to actually perform the fundamental core tasks which most other more conscientious and civic-minded mayors routinely do all over the USA. Last week we learned that Godfrey was taking steps toward long overdue River Project slum clearance; and this morning we learn that Boss Godfrey wants to buy two new firetrucks for the Emerald City public safety agency which Godfrey normally loves to abuse... The Ogden Fire Department:
Ogden seeks two new pumper trucks
We don't know what to make of this latest apparent behavioral aberration, although we admit we are tempted to conclude that it could simply be the result of Boss Godfrey's oft-demonstrated arrested emotional development. You know... little kids love firetrucks... right?

Seriously though, it's patently evident that something truly odd is going on here. Is it possible, gentle readers, that Godfrey is turning over a new leaf and embarking upon a new course, ten years into his administration, whereby he'll finally throw the childish obsessions aside (see, eg., $2.5 million Giant Indoor Icicle and $14 million Bicycle Track) and begin attending to the fundamental chores that the citizens of Emerald City originally elected him to do?

We'll definitely be watching closely over the coming months.

Let's get back to the fire truck question though, where it appears on the surface at least that Godfrey's new commitment to beef up the Fire Department motor pool represents a substantial and encouraging "new direction":

Before we go overboard, and award Boss Godfrey a highly coveted Weber County Forum Tip O' The Hat, we'd like to hear from our gentle readers on the subject, especially those readers like Fireman Joe, (whom we presume to be employed by the OFD.) So how bout it, O Gentle Ones? Does the percipient purchase of two new firetrucks signal a notable new Godfrey administration commitment to public safety? Will Godfrey henceforth stop beating up on the Fire Department? Or in the big picture, will the addition of these new vehicles merely amount to a very slight drop in a very empty bucket? Is Godfrey merely and reluctantly purchasing new firetrucks because the old ones simply don't work anymore?

Don't let the cat get your tongues.


Fireman Joe said...

One of the trucks being replaced cost the city $500,000 in a single year in maintainence, the other engine has caught on fire while on it's way to calls.

A new station-I won't hold my breath.

Viktor said...

I think I will learn to love this new fire truck idea as soon as I see it's tread marks across the little prick's forehead.

RudiZink said...

Thanks for the clarification, Joe. I had a funny feeling it had to be something like that. No WCF Hat Tip for Boss Godfrey, I guess.

Fireman Joe said...

Rudi- none of that matters a federal grant must be involved.

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